It is done

"Then Jesus told his disciples, 'This very night you will all fall away on account of me, for it is written:

I will strike the shepherd, and the sheep of the flock will be scattered.

"'But after I have risen. I will go ahead of you into Galilee.'

"Peter replied, 'Even if all fall away on account of you, I never will.'

"'I tell you the truth,' Jesus answered, 'this very night, before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times.'"

As this year's long election season was coming to a climatic close Tuesday, Evangelical Christian leaders everywhere urged people to get out and vote based on Biblical values and pray that God would deliver this election to the candidate that would support the "sanctity" of marriage and oppose abortion rights. Fearful of the contagious tide that has even swept some of their own into the liberal side of the aisle, they have in some cases felt the need to first convince people that Barack Obama (who supports homosexual domestic partnership rights and is pro-choice) is NOT the Messiah, such as this obsessive and unconvincing website: http://therefinersfire.org/messiah_obama.htm

Could it be that Evangelical Christians are right that Barack Obama is not the Messiah? Or are they merely afraid to confess allegiance to him, just as Peter disowned Christ? Worse yet, are they the ones of the religious establishment that would crucify him for threatening the status quo? And if the world condemns him, who among us will dare to stand by his side?

It is challenging to find clear parallels between now and then. Barack Obama's disciples are now celebrating his triumphal ascendence to supreme worldly power, not cowering away from association with a spiritually righteous man facing execution by worldly powers. Is this a celebration of the reign of God on earth? Or is it a disastrous acquiescence of transcendent righteousness to worldly structures? What happens when the Messiah becomes Caesar?

Dear followers, let us be careful that we not become the evil we seek to defeat as we remember the reprimand of the prophets: "Take away from me the noise of your songs; I will not listen to the melody of your harps. But let justice roll down like waters, and righteousness like and ever-flowing stream."

Spreading the 'what, what' around

On the campaign trail, John McCain continues to incessently promote the idea that Barack Obama, if elected, will want to take control our hard-earned money and redistribute money from wealthy people, a la Socialism. Barack Obama, meanwhile, has been reticent to own up to the fact that, indeed, he does intend to implement a more steeply graduated income tax than under the current system and thereby plans to spread the wealth around a bit more equitably. The Obama camp will tell you that they are not about income redistribution or spreading wealth around but about strengthening the middle class by giving them a tax break and raising taxes on the rich to the levels they were during the Clinton years. Do you want to redistribute wealth? No. Do you want to raise taxes on the wealthy and cut taxes on the poor? Yes. It reminds me of what one juvenile delinquent in my neck of the woods once famously said: "I'm not a drug dealer, I just get drugs from people who have them and sell them at a profit to people who want them." He may have a promising career as a politician, though he will probably have to deal with accusations of "spreading the drugs around."

So derogative is the notion of "spreading the wealth around" that Joe Biden even suggested in an interview that the only people to have "spread the wealth around" are George Bush and John McCain. Apparently they are redistributing the wealth up, according to Biden. Biden says that he and Obama just want to give the middle class a fighting chance, not redistribute wealth. Asked if he would respond to fears that Obama would try to turn America into a Socialist country like Sweden, Biden replied that that was a ridiculous notion that you would only hear from people on the far Right. Sweden might be a really nice country with a rock-solid democracy, great health-care coverage, long life-expectancies, and virtually no poverty, but it damn well isn't the greatest country in the world like our country is and only a lunatic would suggest that a legitimate presidential candidate might move us in that direction.

What we really need in this country, though (besides not becoming like Sweden), is to "spread the love around." I think that that is what Jesus was really all about and that's what Obama needs to be about as well. If you are rich in love, give a bit of it to someone who maybe doesn't have so much. Don't worry, Karl Marx didn't come up with this one, I did; and my name's Joe...Joe the Blogger. You can trust me. I believe that when we spread the love around it's good for everybody. Maybe John McCain just needs a little love because he's been down in the polls. I think it'd be good for the country if Barack just went a gave him a big hug. I know that some of you worked really hard to earn as much love as you have, but what good will it be if everyone else is love-poor? Think "magic penny." And, besides, you can still keep all of your regular pennies.

Imagine it, filthy rich people with seven houses, twelve cars and $150,000 of clothes on their back and dirt-poor bums with no health insurance exchanging mutual love. What a country we will have when the corporate executive with the 3-million dollar home sends a card saying "thinking of you" to the day laborer who just worked another 70-hour week trying to cover medical bills for his son's broken arm! I'm getting teary eyed just thinking about it.

Spreading the wealth around is for Commies, Socialists, and (I think) terrorists. Spreading the drugs around is for our delinquent youth who grew up in poverty and didn't have access to social services when they were young and for far-left, tax and spend, liberals who think people should be able to afford their prescription medication. But spreading the love around is for everybody. We all sang the magic penny song didn't we? Granted we also all watched Robin Hood, but I'm sure we know better now.

America is the greatest country in the world and the greatest commandment is to love our neighbor as ourself. So please spread the word around: from each according to his ability to each according to his need, it's time to spread the love around!

Blessings in the name of Obama.

On this we can agree...

On the campaign trail recently, John McCain has been advertising a comment Barack Obama made about the virtue of “spreading the wealth around.” It goes without saying that guys like Joe the Plumber understand that spreading the wealth around is a big no-no. It reeks of Socialism, which is just simply a bad word and should never be uttered unless accompanied by an extremely derogatory adjective of some kind. It follows simple logic therefore that Barack Obama is a Socialist and therefore not someone we can have in the White House.

Senator Obama, meanwhile, has shot back saying that he’s only raising taxes on the wealthy according to the levels they were at in the 90’s, that John McCain opposed George Bush’s tax cuts in 2000, and that McCain’s current strategy is not to help Joe the Plumber but to help Joe the Hedge Fund Manager. Which makes me give a big sigh of relief: at least we can all agree that “Joe” is the most average of all Americans regardless of his occupation. This, I feel, is the most American of all notions: that all men are created equal and that the most equal of all of them are guys named Joe. There shall be no Ahmeds, Juans, or Xinhous (that’s a common Chinese name by the way) representing middle America, that’s just common sense.

But as for this Socialist thing, we all probably know by now that Jesus was a community organizer and Pontius Pilate was a governor. We also know that Barack Obama was a community organizer and Sarah Palin is a governor who spent campaign money (from Joe the plumber/hedgefund manager/teacher/firefighter/small business owner’s taxes) to buy fancy clothes for her family. Furthermore what we all probably suspect is that Jesus was also a Socialist or, at least, that he thought when you spread the wealth around it’s good for everybody. He once advised a very wealthy man to sell all that he had and give it to the poor (Matthew 19:21) after all. Sounds pretty Socialist to me. And while I guess I can’t call Jesus “un-Christian,” I sure as hell can call him “un-American.”

There you have it: Barack Obama and Jesus are both too un-American to be president. I think we all suspected this from the beginning anyway—I mean, how many honest, hardworking, unlicensed, back-tax owing plumbers named “Barack” do you know? And if you did, would you even trust him to unclog your toilet? Of course not; you’d tell Barack to call his boss and send Joe on over, because that’s what this country’s all about: having a name you can trust.

That's why I say, "Obama for Jesus, not president!"

Thank you Colin Powell

Thank you Colin Powell, no not for your endorsement of Barack Obama, which will surely secure his victory in two weeks, but for the following (as reported by the AP):

"Powell also said he was troubled that some Republicans — he excluded McCain — continue to say or allow others to say that Obama is a Muslim, when he is a Christian. Such rhetoric is polarizing, he said.

"'He's always been a Christian. But the really right answer is, what if he is? Is there something wrong with being a Muslim in this country? The answer's no, that's not America,' Powell said. 'Is there something wrong with some 7-year-old Muslim-American kid believing that he or she could be president?'"

Presidential comedy

John McCain and Barack Obama both gave hilarious presentations at the Al Smith Memorial Charity Fundraiser. You'll note that McCain tried to end his speech on a serious note but the crowd took it as a joke anyway.

http://news.yahoo.com/video/2469;_ylt=ArwtIcBa1HTNcwyePsbYwzBh24cA

Joe the Plumber: a closet "OfJ" supporter

Ohio plumber, Joe Wurzelbacher, became America's newest celebrity last night when John McCain introduced him in the final presidential debate as an honest, hardworking American who looked at Barack Obama's tax plan and decided he didn't like it. For the next hour or so of the debate, helping Joe Wurzelbacher thrive as a plumber in rural Ohio dwarfed the importance of propping up Lehman Brothers and AIG combined.

But first, who is this Joe the Plumber? Let's be clear, Joe the Plumber is just your average Joe Six-Pack, which is to say he's just like you and me. Unless of course your name isn't Joe (like mine is) and you don't buy your beer in packs of six or have rock-solid abs (like I do). Frankly, in fact, if you aren't a white, Budweiser-drinking, blue collar worker, who believes in everyone's right to get filthy rich, and who clings to guns and religion instead of sound economic policy when you don't get rich, then you probably aren't much like Joe Six-Pack or Joe the Plumber at all, which is to say that you should probably just leave the country and move to Canada or England where you'll like your health-care coverage better than here since, according to John McCain, those are the places that have health-care plans similar to what Barack Obama is proposing and, since you clearly aren't a Joe Six-Pack, you're probably planning on voting for Barack Obama and want to live in a place with health-care plans like his (which, I reiterate, is an extremely un-American health-care plan).

But let's be clear again, Joe "the plumber" Wurzelbacher, is a real person. Joe Six-Pack is an fictitious amalgamation of "average" Americans. And while I'm pretty sure Joe Six-Pack is American enough that he would vote Republican, if he could, Joe the Plumber is refusing to reveal who he will vote for. In an interview this morning with ABC news, Joe ("the Plumber" not "Six-Pack") expressed opposition to any tax plan that redistributes wealth or taxes the wealthy higher than other people but he retained his right to keep his voting intentions private. Joe revealed that he does not currently make anywhere close to $250,000 (the income threshold at which tax payers will start seeing a tax increase under Barack Obama's plan). He is, however, interested in buying the plumbing business that he has worked for most of his life and hopes to make over $250,000 if he becomes the owner.

Joe knows that people have to pay taxes, he just doesn't think that a person should be punished with higher taxes just because he worked harder and earned more money. Joe Wurzelbacher put a human face to the tragedy that will befall all the Americans out there who will see their taxes cut under Barack Obama's tax proposal until they start earning over $250,000 per year, at which point they will see their taxes go up. I think that for many viewers this dire image of an honest, hardworking, white, American male seeing his taxes cut en route to realizing the American dream, only to see his taxes go up a little, really hit home.

Joe is a person that we can trust not just to fix our leaky faucets but to give us political advice as well. We can trust him because, well, he's like us, I mean, most of us (the ones of us who shouldn't move to Canada or England). He's not an Arab, for example, or a Muslim. And I'm pretty sure that he likes beer (not English beer, good ol' American beer with no grounding in the English brewing tradition). He's also not a woman, although he has a wife who supports supporting autistic children. And he's a plumber. Did I say that already? We can trust him for all these reasons, which is why I was proud to get his support for Barack Obama to be the next Jesus of the United States. It turns out that Joe Wurzelbacher (raised Jewish but now non-religious) finds in Obama a spiritual link that has been missing in his life. He believes in Obama's message of hope and change, get's a tingle up his spine when Obama speaks about a unified America, and lauds Obama's efforts as a community organizer in Chicago's southside. Wurzelbacher believes that government is no place to enforce religious values but he thinks that the people ought to work together to feed the hungry, clothe the naked, and comfort the afflicted. And he believes that Barack Obama is the one to lead us.

Thanks for your endorsement Joe! We'll teach those yuppie liberals what office Obama belongs in.

Polling the readership

As the number of people who read "Obama for Jesus" religiously grows, I've decided it's time to get a better sense of who you are. Thus, I introduce the first "Obama for Jesus" poll, which you will find to the right.